In the Teen Summit survey, 17% of young people said they’d experienced sexual harassment at school. This included behaviours like wolf whistling, inappropriate comments and 15% of the teenagers who were surveyed saying they’d received persistent and unwanted nude images or videos from a peer.The survey also suggests 32% of those questioned have been exposed to pornographic content online or on social media, while 55% have seen sexist content online or on social media. We cannot ignore the role this may play in normalising the objectification of bodies and the expression of disrespectful attitudes and behaviours.Children learn what is acceptable from the environments around them. The more frequently they encounter misogynistic, sexist or objectifying messages, the more ordinary these behaviours can begin to feel.Having conversations about consent and healthy relationships is not a ‘nice to have’. They have to be a parental priority.
Keep an open dialogue about the digital diet your child has” – Dr Martha Deiros-Collado
Many parents worry about saying the wrong thing but having the right language is less important than having the conversation. So, start and think of it as something you can revisit and keep discussing. Conversations around consent and respect are never a ‘one-off’. You may want to start off the conversation with something that sounds like: “What do you think counts as ‘flirting’ and when does it cross the line? How can you tell what the difference is”.Focus on teaching life skills including talking about porn (not ‘if’ they see it, but for when they do), what ‘red flag feelings’ might be (e.g. anxiety, feeling scared) and what they can do if they are sent a nude image (e.g. if online, block, talk to a safe person and report it. Or, if in person, who they can speak to and that they will never get into trouble for speaking up).Keep an open dialogue about the digital diet your child has. Make it routine to check in with your child on what they’ve seen and experienced online in the same way you check in with what they did and experienced at school or when hanging out with friends.Monitor digital habits by creating communal spaces and going online together so you can build digital skills in real time with them. And ensure that you embed a culture of consent and respect in your home and with those around you. Children need to experience the foundation of healthy relationships to understand when things feel unsafe. Ensure you name it, call it out, and practice what you preach.
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